The teen and the twin tweens and I all sat down to dinner. This doesn’t happen very often at all so I decided to take advantage of it. I told them I was working on a post for this site and I wanted their input. The tweens jumped on it. The teen…well, he was a teen and wouldn’t answer in the beginning and then saw the twins answering and got into it.
What is something you wish Dad and I understood that you think we don’t?
Teen (15): I don’t know.
Tween 1 (12): I wish you’d give more thought to our social life (this is code for I don’t let them hang out as much as he wants).
Tween 2 (12): We’ll do what you ask but not right away. (Hmmm…)
What is something you wish your teachers understood that you don’t think they do?
Teen (jumped right in): How tired we are with everything we do.
Tween 1: How busy we are and how hard it is to get everything done (practice, homework and treatments).
Tween 2: I wish they knew how hard it is to study when we have homework in other classes and that their class isn’t the only class we have.
What is something Dad and I do that you appreciate?
Teen: Support me in the sports I play.
Tween 1: I love that you will let us reason with you when we want something (Funny thing, here. I do not love this and it is not on purpose).
Tween 2: I love when you give me advice.
What is something you don’t like?
Teen (and not surprise to me at all): You don’t give me enough privacy. (Guess what? Get good grades, go away to college and you can have all the privacy you want.)
Tween 1: I don’t like when you guys repeat yourself when I don’t do what you ask me the first time. (I wonder if he thinks I enjoy it.)
Tween 2: I don’t like when you guys run out of patience. (Maybe we wouldn’t run out of patience if we didn’t have to repeat everything or wait until you wanted to do what we asked you to do.)
What are traits you look for in friends?
Teen: Someone that knows when to be funny or goofy and knows when to be serious.
Tween 1: Trustworthy and caring
Tween 2: Supportive
What is one thing that you are most proud of so far in your life?
Teen: Being pulled up to varsity football this summer and for the playoffs.
Tween 1: How I am growing as an athlete.
Tween 2: How I’ve grown as a cheerleader.
I said a word and they had to say the first word that comes to mind.
Tween 1: The Boss (There are no words for how much I love this answer.)
Tween 2: Trustworthy (I think they like the way this word sounds.)
Tween 1: Caring
Tween 2: Funny, he makes me laugh
Teen: Hate (This makes me sad.)
Tween 1: Dreadful (He’s not dramatic or anything.)
Tween 2: Used to love
Tween 1: Together/Teamwork
Tween 2: Loving
The school one is now a concern and it makes me sad that all three of them used to love school and now none of them do.
What’s one place you want to visit?
Tween 1: Italy (Maybe to explore that part of his ancestry?)
Tween 2: Paris (This one shocked me. I had no idea.)
I learned a lot from this interview-type discussion. I learned that my kids love to be asked questions or interviewed. There was a discussion after each of the questions that I wish I could include but this post would be even longer than it is. We talked about how privacy is a privilege that goes along with maturity and trust. We discussed good traits to have or look for in friends. I learned that my kids’ activities still bring them happiness and give them something to be proud of. I learned that I need to get to the bottom of why they don’t like school anymore and that they don’t take any sort of responsibility for not listening the first time. It’s our fault for asking so many times. The important thing I took away from this was that kids love undivided attention and when they are really heard.
Oh, and Tommy’s “The Boss” answer. That was my favorite surprise. 🙂
What about you? Have you ever began a discussion with your kids by interviewing them? Were you surprised by any of the answers?
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