Teens and Valentine's Day When I was in high school, cheerleaders sold flowers on Valentine’s Day for one dollar with notes attached to them from the sender. As a cheerleader, I’d deliver them to unsuspecting girls or guys during the last hour of school. There were squeals of joy from girls beaming that someone bought them a long-stemmed white or red carnation. As a teacher … [Read more...]
Is it Trendy to Date a Geek Nowadays?
Here is a question for you: do you remember when being a geek was a bad thing? I know I sure do, being that I was one my entire childhood. The "cool" kids didn't play video games or like science fiction. They didn't dream of taking the ring to Mordor or being a Jedi. They didn't listen to underground indie bands and wear tshirts with Atari references. But now you see the IT … [Read more...]
Love in the Tween Years
Nothing strikes fear in a parent’s heart like these words from your 11-year-old, “Mom, I’m in love.” When you have twins that come home and say it, it is a recipe for a crazy stew of hormones. I can’t say this is foreign territory. I was always boy-crazy. I was told this from as early as I can remember. I remember the boy I liked in second grade. I remember my third … [Read more...]
The Double Date
If I wasn't surrounded by half of our town, I would have cried. I was proud of myself. Outwardly I was keeping my composure. Inside, I was dying. Dressed in their baseball uniforms, I watched my tweens walk toward the friends they had spotted. The boys had asked if they could go say hello. The Big Guy and I agreed...reminding them that if they misbehaved, they were marching … [Read more...]
5 Tips for Responsible Dating
Perhaps parents are not too ecstatic about their teenager starting to date. It is something that can cause much anxiety for a mother who would be up all night, wondering or worried. Even if you wish the time your teenager will never have to date, it will happen. The only sane thing to do is to prepare your child to this eventuality and hope that everything comes out fine. … [Read more...]
Dr. Wes and Young Adult Panel Discuss Sex Live on the Radio
This is probably the best radio show I've done in the last year. I recruited three 19 to 22 year old college girls (sorry no boys responded!) to speak on the topic of teen sexuality and dating, and wow did they. There is no morning better spent than one in which we talk openly with three articulate (and very entertaining) young people about the important issues of sexuality. As … [Read more...]
Double Take: So, Which Teens Aren’t Having Sex?
Dr. Wes: One of the hottest topics in my media interviews on parenting this year has been “is my teen having sex?” Apparently teen sex creates an a lot more mystery for parents, which always baffles me. Here’s what we know: 47% of high school students have had sexual intercourse, and 35% report being sexually active at any given moment survey. The average age for first … [Read more...]
Double Take: Sexually Explicit Sites and Teen Dating Violence?
Dr. Wes: In July I posted an article on Facebook (www.facebook.com/FamilyPsychologicalServices) in which Keir Starmer, the top British prosecutor suggests that teenage relationships are now more violent due to the prevalence of Internet pornography. He cites research showing “that exploitation and violence in teenage relationships are more common than previously thought” and … [Read more...]
Double Take: Teen “Dating” Then and Now
Dr. Wes: I’m often asked how different dating is today than it was in the eighties or nineties. I usually reply “very.” By that I mean that kids just don’t couple these days like they used to. I may sound like I’m waxing philosophic about those good old days of yore that always end up being more legend than reality, but the facts are pretty clear. Culturally, the idea of sex … [Read more...]
Double Take: Real Life Advice for Parents and Teens–Unrequited Love
Dear Dr. Wes & Miranda: I think I'm falling in love with a guy who I know is not in love with me. He keeps telling me that we're only friends. Why can't I hear him? I keep thinking he's going to finally see me as the perfect girl for him, because I know I am. Miranda: This letter sounds like a lot of romantic comedies I’ve seen. The girl likes the guy, but he doesn’t … [Read more...]
Double Take: Real Life Advice for Parents and Teens–Brazilian Waxing for Teens? We Smell a Rat.
Dear Dr. Wes: I’m seventeen. My girlfriends told me that if I want to get with a guy I need to get a Brazilian Wax; and that all the boys they know will only be with me if I do it. I assume you know what that is. It sounds terrible to me and it will hurt and I don’t want to do it, but they’re pressuring me. What is your advice? Dr. Wes: After 19 years of practice it takes … [Read more...]
Double Take: Real Life Advice for Parents and Teens–Mean Girls Undercutting the Dating Pool
Miranda Davis: Teenage girls are mean and if you survived junior high you know this. Once a girl hits that fourteen- to fifteen-year-old mindset, she can become so devious it leads to destructive behavior. We tend to be competitive, over-thinking creatures as it is, but something about the high school environment turns this toxic. Anyone seen Mean Girls? It’s based on a book … [Read more...]
Lesson 1: Domestic Violence
There have been times I’ve discussed teaching on the blog. I’ve been deliberately vague – because I was still teaching. I talked about How I Told My Students about Alexander the first year back… And how I told them the Second Time. I blogged about how My Students Saved Me from drowning in Special Needs, and I blogged my farewellLetters to my Students. I even blogged my … [Read more...]