For months I've anticipated the new normal for our family of six which, in the last year, went from four to five, to six for the summer, then abruptly down to three. Our oldest left for the mission field full time and child #3 starts his freshman year in college where he'll play basketball. Child #2, now engaged, is a senior in college, and the youngest still has three years … [Read more...]
Why Vacationing With Older Kids Is Great
While on vacation with my family recently I saw a lot of parents with young kids by the pool, juggling Sippy cups and strollers and managing meltdowns and toddlers on the run. As cute as many of the kids were, and as much as I wouldn’t mind not needing reading glasses or frequent hair coloring to cover the grey, I couldn’t help thinking how grateful I am to not be one of those … [Read more...]
To Be A Woman First
“Hey Mom,” my son yells as he blasts into the house; his backpack landing on the foyer floor with a thud as he peels off his jacket and runs up the stairs. “Okay, so we are going to play soccer at the rec, then a bunch of us are going over to Oscar’s house.” His words reach me in my home office before he does, derailing my train of thought. “Who is ‘we’ and how are you … [Read more...]
Dear Son – It Was Never About Today
When Anger is Masked as Fear I yelled. And once I started I couldn’t stop. My voice ricocheted like bullets all over the room. I had tripped the safety and that trigger was hot. Normally so measured and careful with my words, it was liberating to just let the fur fly. Lost in my heated release, I never focused on your face. My anger blurred the edges, obscuring the hurt … [Read more...]
Moving Out
It's something I used to do when I was a child—staying in the tub so long the bath water turns tepid, my fingers pruned into deep whitened grooves. As a seven-year old, I would stay in the tub for hours, tracing worlds out in the marbled Formica installed above the tub sides—a swirling blue-grey that turned into wild oceanic currents, astral breezes suspending ships born aloft, … [Read more...]
The Trouble in Connecting with Other People is… Me
Making Friends When Your Kids are Older I remember when my daughter was preschool age. It was easy to meet the other moms and set up play dates, which were as much for the moms as they were for the kids. This trend continued into kindergarten and the early elementary years. Because we walked the kids up to the door before school started and waited for the kids after school, I … [Read more...]
Top 6 Memory Problems Plaguing Middle-Aged Me
We’ve got a running joke in our family about my sporadic memory that begins with me uttering the phrase “I think I’ll try the Pad Thai.” Here’s the quick backstory: We go to Pei Wei for dinner every few months. It’s got great Asian food, freshly made, and reasonably priced. The menu doesn’t change much, and there aren’t an overwhelming amount of entrees, maybe 15 or so. So we … [Read more...]
How To Declutter: Life Lesson from The Life Changing Magic of Tidying Up
Twice this past week, friends have mentioned they are reading a book on how to declutter, The life changing magic of tidying up – the Japanese art of decluttering and organizing by Marie Kondo. Apparently, one of the principles is to only keep things if it sparks joy. Only keep the extra blanket, vanilla, battery, notebook you may need one day ONLY if it sparks joy. A … [Read more...]
Mistaking Customers For Employees
Hey - Can You Help Me? No matter how many “boost your memory” books I’ve read, I can't remember people’s names. I may recognize a face but draw a blank on a name unless the person goes by “Hey, nice to see you” or “How’s it going?” For years I’ve covered up my bad name recall and even limited my circle of friends to people who have the same name (mind if I call you Sue?), … [Read more...]
BFF
“I think I have a new BF,” I told my two daughters as we were eating breakfast before school one morning. Based on the expressions on their faces, I realized I’d mixed up my abbreviations again. Cameron snickered into her cereal. “Really?” Emma asked, eyebrows raised. “New boyfriend? Daddy’s only been gone a week.” “BF is boyfriend?” I asked. “What’s the friend one … [Read more...]
Reinventing Yourself When You’re a Parent – Podcast with Vikki Spencer
Remember the days before you were a parent? Or even before you were a spouse? What kind of things did you like to do - things that made you excited and that you were passionate about? If you're like most of us - me included - you've lost that piece of you. Who knows... you may not even remember WHAT you liked to do before you became a family. If this sounds all too … [Read more...]
7 Reasons Busyness is Not the Answer
People tell you time goes fast when your kids are young. You smile and look at them like you wish they’d really shut up because your kid just puked on you and you’d really like some sleep. Most moms inwardly dream of when your kids are older. At least I did. Then, your kid hits middle school. Time moves faster. Things get busier, and you live on a school year to school year … [Read more...]
I Laughed So Hard Tears Ran Down My Leg
Get Back to Living Your Life Without Being Afraid to Laugh or Sneeze! Ladies, if you are reading this in public, I want you to look up from your screen and pick out three random women. Chances are, one of those women - maybe even you - is afraid to laugh or sneeze or cough. Why? Because she knows that if she does, there's a good chance she'll leak. She may also hate long car … [Read more...]
A Few Things This “Cougar” Wants You Guys To Know
Just the other day I was standing in line at the local Tim Horton’s (it’s a Canadian thing), approached by a nice looking guy. Still wet behind the ear’s, but adorable none-the-less. Bumping into me, oh-so subtly, he smiled and said “Sorry (another Canadian thing) but you are beautiful, those eyes.” I of course, blushed and said thank you, because us Canadian’s, we are polite. … [Read more...]
Six Thousand Goodnights
I have said goodnight to my children approximately six thousand times. I lay them down in their cribs after kissing the tops of their soft heads, inhaling deeply to catch that delicious sweet baby scent. One night I smelled that scent for the very last time. I don’t remember when my youngest stopped smelling like a baby, or when that last night was. But I do still inhale … [Read more...]
Never “Toy” With Older Women!
There are board games meant for almost all phases of life – – from childhood to teens and even for the thirty-something crowd. But why should a certain gender/age group be left out with nothing but “Old Maid” to entertain them? Here are some newly revamped fun nights around the kitchen table for the 40 to 55 year-old female demographic. And men, don’t stop reading here – – … [Read more...]
How to Look at Your Mama Scars Like a Badge of Honor
Having kids changes your life...this I expected. Commercials told me so as did every other human being on the planet the four times I've worn my swollen tick-like expectant mama body. What I hadn't prepared myself for and what no one else could have, are the body battle scars I now carry with me. I have listed them, in no particular order, below: The Big V--get your mind … [Read more...]
Crepe Erase Review
There IS help for crepey skin! Disclosure: I participated in an Influencer Activation on behalf of Influence Central for Crepe Erase. I received product samples to facilitate my review and a promotional item to thank me for my participation. This is the second post in our review of the Crepe Erase system. I started using the Crepe Erase system just over 3 weeks ago and have … [Read more...]
Crepe Erase First Impression
Good Skin Care - Better Late than Never Disclosure: I participated in an Influencer Activation on behalf of Influence Central for Crepe Erase. I received product samples to facilitate my review and a promotional item to thank me for my participation. A long, long time ago and for a very brief period of time, I sold BeautiControl cosmetics. And while I didn't do it long, one … [Read more...]
“Is That Even A Thing” At Our Age? (New Mid-Life Slang!)
Little Miss Menopause’s Shabang Slang for The Older Gang! Why does the Y generation get to have all the cool slanguage? They get to say “Totes” and “Probs” and "Adorbs.” Oops, my bad. Some of us X and Boomer kiddos tend to speak like this also, but I think it makes us sound like wannabes. Did someone lock us in a Forever 21 fitting room? But never fear -- I can do better … [Read more...]