Special Needs Tween Struggles to Find Friends


My son started middle school earlier this month and there have been lots of changes since elementary school -- changing classes, having a locker and a whole new social structure. Gone are the days when boys and girls ate lunch or hung out at recess together. Also apparently gone -- having moms set up play dates although we can’t call them play dates anymore – it’s called … [Read more...]

What Are We Teaching About Friendship?

teaching about friendship

We all want to find friendships that are meaningful and fulfilling with like-minded people who share our interests and values. As parents, you want the same for your kids. But could you be sending the wrong message? Sometimes we worry so much about just having friends (for ourselves and our loved ones) that we don’t stop to think emphasize the importance of quality … [Read more...]

Time Stops

Time Stops

Time Stops  25-September-2012 I hope to be accurate when I state that, at some point or another, we’ve all had a moment when Time Stopped.  If we’re very very fortunate, we’ve had many.  More good than bad, and the good so very far outweighs the bad such that no matter how slow time passes during the daily grind, we make up for it during the timeless moments that we get to … [Read more...]



Apologies I’m going to open with a short discussion Ezra and I had recently…  we had an incident where an adult’s conduct was less than stellar in front of Ezra.  If my children get out of line, I expect them to apologize and make things right.  I expect that from adults as well.  Kids are more likely than adults to handle that gracefully, in my experience.  In this … [Read more...]

A World Without Heroes Video Discussion

I had a wonderful conversation with Stacey Seguin, owner of paloozaonline dot com. She is a regular reader of tentotwenty and agreed to participate in a video chat about our respective perspectives on Brandon Mull's A World Without Heroes. Be sure and read my review of the book here, and let us know your opinion of the book in the comments section below! If you like our … [Read more...]

Double Take: Everyday Suicide Prevention


Dr. Wes: While suicide is the third leading cause of death among teens (ranking behind accidents and murder), it remains thankfully rare. About 1,500 teens are known to commit suicide in a given year in the United States. Each incident asks us to reexamine our communities and ourselves to consider why it happens at all. Though we’ve shared them before[1], I worry that lists … [Read more...]

Old-Fashioned Friendship

The glare of two computer screens in a dark room assaulted my retina as soon as I walked into my daughter's bedroom to say goodnight to her and her friend, who was spending the weekend with us. I immediately reminded them of the lateness of the hour and the No Electronics After 8pm policy. "Let's be friends the old-fashioned way instead!" I suggested as I turned to leave, … [Read more...]

Double Take: Real Life Advice for Parents and Teens–Brazilian Waxing for Teens? We Smell a Rat.

 Dear Dr. Wes: I’m seventeen. My girlfriends told me that if I want to get with a guy I need to get a Brazilian Wax; and that all the boys they know will only be with me if I do it. I assume you know what that is. It sounds terrible to me and it will hurt and I don’t want to do it, but they’re pressuring me. What is your advice? Dr. Wes: After 19 years of practice it takes … [Read more...]

The Things Your Kids Talk About: Dealing With the School Rumor Mill

Teen Girls Gossiping

Last week, my youngest came home and was telling me about her day at school.  Usually this conversation consists of funny things the teacher said, some problem she’s having with homework, and the usual musical chairs that goes on at lunch because she wants to be able to sit with all her friends who don’t all sit together. And then there was this: Mom, Joe was having sex with … [Read more...]

Preach It!

I am so extremely fortunate to have an open and honest relationship with my teenager. She and I talk about anything and she tells me everything (I hope). Last night as we walked together and caught up on our day she shared the latest installment regarding a particular friend and some ongoing issues that are present in their friendship. I listened and asked a few questions … [Read more...]

Friends Through Thick or Thin – Or Until Your Baggage Outweighs You

We’ll always be best friends. You know too much about me. Ahhh… there is so much truth in that cute little statement. Your besties were there long before theman was and definitely before the kids were there interrupting your phone conversations. So of course they’re the ones you reach out to when you’ve got good news to share, bad news to break or just have to tell them you … [Read more...]

Year of the 10th Birthday Party and Making Friends.

I'm preparing to attend another birthday party for one of my daughter's friend.  We have attended several parties this year.   And when I say this year, I mean since school started.  In our experience, more parents are throwing parties celebrating 10th birthdays than other birthday years.  My daughter even persuaded me to give her a party at a movie theatre last November. We … [Read more...]