How Many Children Should I Have?


Despite the seemingly fast-paced lifestyle, many couples still have time to sit down and quibble over their ideal family size.

Let us not break your bubbles just yet. But there is actually no one-size-fits-all number of team members in your family. Because surprisingly, large families feel sorry for those with small size families and vice versa. There is no correct answer to the question, “How many children should I have?”

So, before jumping into that family boat, know that there are some medical and personal aspects that you should consider in determining your ideal family size. And if you are mainly on the count to ensure you are conceiving or not, a due date calculator often plays its part.

Is it ideal to have only one child and focus all your attention on them or have a bunch so you will always have someone to be with? The bonus part is they will have instant friends!

To discuss, here are some questions you need to answer to help you determine your ideal number of children and help you make your own informed decision.

  1. What are your personal goals and values?

In all you do, you should always make it a point to do it to reach your goals in life. Of course, your goals are rooted in your values. So, what are they? Your personal goals and values should tell you your status in the years to come, the number of people around you, the size of your house, your travel goals, and your future responsibilities. After considering those, ask yourself how these may align with children in tow. Do they even fit the picture? 

  1. How is your financial status?

We may be talking about your finances at present or in the future. That depends on how soon you consider adding up another plate on the table. Are you ready to face additional bills to pay during pregnancy, at birth, or a few years more for school? You know, raising a child is a costly thing! Remember the cost of living in your area and the money you have to shell out for healthcare and education. A child would need this kind of financial support until they are independent and can fend for themselves. So better think about adding one more child to the family. 

  1. What is your health status?

This is a dilemma that needs more pondering than what others think. If you are a woman, know whether your body can handle it before getting pregnant. Pregnancy and childbirth alone are physically demanding. Healthwise, your body should be ready to take all that changes about to happen within nine months and even after that! Your health status also means your family history of certain illnesses. Your family doctor may inform you whether you have a high risk for pregnancy. Having an illness will also be challenging for a parent. So be realistic and tell yourself if you can still care for another human.

  1. What is your partner’s preference?

Not all people in a relationship want children, and not all those who wish to have children are in a relationship. This question is even for those considering having company in rearing a child. When having children, sit down and talk about it with your partner. Lucky for some couples, family size would never be an issue between them. But for those who might make a big deal out of this, be honest and talk your heart out. Make a compromise. That always works well.

  1. What is your cultural background?

Never thought of this, eh? Some cultures consider a big family as a lucky charm. It brings about prosperity and good fortune. However, some strictly adhere to a small family because it is “more responsible.” Well, the final say is still up to the couple. So, just put it on the list. 

Just a bit of a disclaimer, not having children does not mean not having a family. But in case you are for a rough-and-rowdy household, these are the points you need to consider to know what family size you are up for – your values, financial status, health, partner preference, and cultural background. 

Deciding your number of children is complex, so better equip yourself with what you need to know first. 


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